Death is easy, Life is hard
I don't really know what I'm going to write about right now, usually I have more of a focus, but tonight, I just feel that I need to write. So here goes.
I just flipped open my bible to a random page, hoping for inspiration. I see a passage I had highlighted, and it is 1 Peter 3:8-9 and it goes like this:
All of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude. Don't repay evil for evil. Don't retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing.
Well this verse is pretty much perfect with the vague idea of what was on my mind. Fighting. I hate when people fight. Like, seriously HATE it. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for a spirited debate, frankly I encourage them and love to actively participate, but fighting is just horrible. It gives me shudders just thinking about it. And that leads me to yesterday.
I got in a fight with someone. I'll call them 'Bob' because it's the first name that popped into my head. Anyway, Bob and I were fighting about something so pathetic, it's not even worth noting. But we fought. And I stormed out, so frustrated. It only took me as far as walking a block away to realize how ridiculous this all was, so I went back to apologize, but they were gone. So I kept walking. And walking. And walking. I walked for probably two hours, and still felt awful. I eventually found Bob and we worked things out, but the past cannot be erased.
I feel bad because I tend to fight a lot. I'm difficult. I'm stubborn. I'm so confusing. I know that. The majority of the fighting I do is within myself. But outwardly, if we are very close, then we've probably fought.
I also feel bad a lot. Like, super bad for fighting, or something I said or didn't say. I'm reminded again of Paul stating that he does the bad that he does not want to do, yet doesn't do the good that he wants to do. Organized chaos is a great statement for that sentence. At first, it doesn't make sense, but looking closely, it makes all the sense in the world.
I've been exceptionally not feeling well the past two days, and the fear in me is rising. Simply because the unknown is scary. And yet, I am calm, because I know the Lord is with me.
That said, I've been trying to focus on being kinder to others. Treating others with the love and respect I would want. I sometimes feel that when I'm sick, it's my fault because I wasn't kind enough today or snapped at someone. I know it's probably illogical, but maybe it's not. I don't know. Either way, it's always better to be kind than not.
So tonight, feeling worse than usual, my mom gave me a back rub. Now, I'm not a back rub kind of girl--I'll give them, but I'm so ticklish that I tend not to receive them. But this one felt wonderful. I could feel my whole body relaxing, tension escaping. And that's when I realized how important the power of touch is to us.
Now any of you who find that phrase sexual or are smirking because of the images it might bring you, I find that utterly ridiculous. As a culture, we have come to think of "touch" as something inappropriate, always sexual, or draws some kind of sick and twisted vision to mind. I am repulsed by that. Because touch is wonderful, touch is powerful, touch is necessary.
When you were a child, did someone not hold you? Does a hug not make you feel wanted? Does someone holding your hand not make you feel needed? A gentle hand on your arm make you feel loved? Touch is essential to human connection and emotional conversation.
I truly believe that when one human touches another in a loving, caring way, their souls are speaking.
As you go about your day, pay attention to how you feel when you hold the one you love. When you help the old lady cross the street, feel how her trust is in the strength you've been blessed with. Feel the sensation of another hugging you in greeting or thanks. Look into the eyes of the one who's hand you hold. Pay attention to touch. And let it make you whole.
I have always been a super touchy person. Again, I mean this in it's innocence. I just love leaning on people, having someone around me, knowing someone is close and there for support. For societal reasons, I have make a clear and definite effort to refrain from these things because I know how they can be interpreted into society. And that's just plain sad.
Hugs release endorphins, and on average people crave about 13 a day, but don't receive them. The older I get, the more I realize that society can screw it. Seriously. I'm tired of trying to conform to the perfect image, not say or do certain things because they might be offensive or too unusual to accept as normal behavior. Aren't you?
So I want you to go out and give someone a hug. Right now. I'll wait.
....................
Okay fine finish reading this first, but make sure you give someone a hug today. They'll appreciate it.
Now as for the title, it seemed appropriate for how I've been feeling lately. Life is incredibly hard. I don't know if death is easy per say, but once again, the unknown is too ambiguous to comment on as of now.
Lastly, I've been thinking a lot about the future. I have this "plan" of a career that I tell people I'm on, but in reality, my heart is in a different place. It's things like these I wish I had someone who knew me to understand. The little things that only someone really close to you realizes. Like when I go on walks. The more I walk, the longer I walk, means there's something wrong. My mind is seriously preoccupied and I can't handle it on my own. Only someone who would truly know me would know this without me telling. It's this and a thousand other little things that I am excited for someone to know. Like my future. People ask me what I want to do with my life, and I have yet to tell someone the real answer. Because it's personal. Because I want to save it for someone who will love me enough to get me there.
Do you have that? Or do you think that? I hope you are able to confide in someone with all your hopes, dreams, passions, pains, confusions. And if you don't have someone specifically on this earth, you know God knows. I believe He puts someone on this earth for us to trust, rely, and love. Call me a hopeless romantic, but my faith in that stands strong. Although some people, I believe, He has another call, maybe a call to love many, or invest their life in something that requires a single life. All of these callings, whether married or unmarried, are important and necessary. All require love.
So when your life gets hard, when you feel like falling, when you cease to feel anything at all, remember the importance of touch.
Remember the importance of touch.
Death is easy, life is hard. Make it a little easier.
Make it a little softer.
Make it a little lovelier.
Now go hug someone.
I just flipped open my bible to a random page, hoping for inspiration. I see a passage I had highlighted, and it is 1 Peter 3:8-9 and it goes like this:
All of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude. Don't repay evil for evil. Don't retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing.
Well this verse is pretty much perfect with the vague idea of what was on my mind. Fighting. I hate when people fight. Like, seriously HATE it. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for a spirited debate, frankly I encourage them and love to actively participate, but fighting is just horrible. It gives me shudders just thinking about it. And that leads me to yesterday.
I got in a fight with someone. I'll call them 'Bob' because it's the first name that popped into my head. Anyway, Bob and I were fighting about something so pathetic, it's not even worth noting. But we fought. And I stormed out, so frustrated. It only took me as far as walking a block away to realize how ridiculous this all was, so I went back to apologize, but they were gone. So I kept walking. And walking. And walking. I walked for probably two hours, and still felt awful. I eventually found Bob and we worked things out, but the past cannot be erased.
I feel bad because I tend to fight a lot. I'm difficult. I'm stubborn. I'm so confusing. I know that. The majority of the fighting I do is within myself. But outwardly, if we are very close, then we've probably fought.
I also feel bad a lot. Like, super bad for fighting, or something I said or didn't say. I'm reminded again of Paul stating that he does the bad that he does not want to do, yet doesn't do the good that he wants to do. Organized chaos is a great statement for that sentence. At first, it doesn't make sense, but looking closely, it makes all the sense in the world.
I've been exceptionally not feeling well the past two days, and the fear in me is rising. Simply because the unknown is scary. And yet, I am calm, because I know the Lord is with me.
That said, I've been trying to focus on being kinder to others. Treating others with the love and respect I would want. I sometimes feel that when I'm sick, it's my fault because I wasn't kind enough today or snapped at someone. I know it's probably illogical, but maybe it's not. I don't know. Either way, it's always better to be kind than not.
So tonight, feeling worse than usual, my mom gave me a back rub. Now, I'm not a back rub kind of girl--I'll give them, but I'm so ticklish that I tend not to receive them. But this one felt wonderful. I could feel my whole body relaxing, tension escaping. And that's when I realized how important the power of touch is to us.
Now any of you who find that phrase sexual or are smirking because of the images it might bring you, I find that utterly ridiculous. As a culture, we have come to think of "touch" as something inappropriate, always sexual, or draws some kind of sick and twisted vision to mind. I am repulsed by that. Because touch is wonderful, touch is powerful, touch is necessary.
When you were a child, did someone not hold you? Does a hug not make you feel wanted? Does someone holding your hand not make you feel needed? A gentle hand on your arm make you feel loved? Touch is essential to human connection and emotional conversation.
I truly believe that when one human touches another in a loving, caring way, their souls are speaking.
As you go about your day, pay attention to how you feel when you hold the one you love. When you help the old lady cross the street, feel how her trust is in the strength you've been blessed with. Feel the sensation of another hugging you in greeting or thanks. Look into the eyes of the one who's hand you hold. Pay attention to touch. And let it make you whole.
I have always been a super touchy person. Again, I mean this in it's innocence. I just love leaning on people, having someone around me, knowing someone is close and there for support. For societal reasons, I have make a clear and definite effort to refrain from these things because I know how they can be interpreted into society. And that's just plain sad.
Hugs release endorphins, and on average people crave about 13 a day, but don't receive them. The older I get, the more I realize that society can screw it. Seriously. I'm tired of trying to conform to the perfect image, not say or do certain things because they might be offensive or too unusual to accept as normal behavior. Aren't you?
So I want you to go out and give someone a hug. Right now. I'll wait.
....................
Okay fine finish reading this first, but make sure you give someone a hug today. They'll appreciate it.
Now as for the title, it seemed appropriate for how I've been feeling lately. Life is incredibly hard. I don't know if death is easy per say, but once again, the unknown is too ambiguous to comment on as of now.
Lastly, I've been thinking a lot about the future. I have this "plan" of a career that I tell people I'm on, but in reality, my heart is in a different place. It's things like these I wish I had someone who knew me to understand. The little things that only someone really close to you realizes. Like when I go on walks. The more I walk, the longer I walk, means there's something wrong. My mind is seriously preoccupied and I can't handle it on my own. Only someone who would truly know me would know this without me telling. It's this and a thousand other little things that I am excited for someone to know. Like my future. People ask me what I want to do with my life, and I have yet to tell someone the real answer. Because it's personal. Because I want to save it for someone who will love me enough to get me there.
Do you have that? Or do you think that? I hope you are able to confide in someone with all your hopes, dreams, passions, pains, confusions. And if you don't have someone specifically on this earth, you know God knows. I believe He puts someone on this earth for us to trust, rely, and love. Call me a hopeless romantic, but my faith in that stands strong. Although some people, I believe, He has another call, maybe a call to love many, or invest their life in something that requires a single life. All of these callings, whether married or unmarried, are important and necessary. All require love.
So when your life gets hard, when you feel like falling, when you cease to feel anything at all, remember the importance of touch.
Remember the importance of touch.
Death is easy, life is hard. Make it a little easier.
Make it a little softer.
Make it a little lovelier.
Now go hug someone.
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